freed from the bondage
of thought
if only in the moment
it takes to breathe out
we are whole
and left at one
with all
(D James)
freed from the bondage
of thought
if only in the moment
it takes to breathe out
we are whole
and left at one
with all
(D James)
it’s become apparent
that my beliefs
belong to others
every thought
each action
triggered
by a past experience
something I’ve read
heard
or seen
there is nothing original
in being a non-conformist
for even that now
is simply conforming to non-conformity
this too does not originate
from me but from another
so perhaps it is not
in ideas
or language
that we are unique
it must be
in that other place
beyond words
beyond the edge of our skin
out in the far reaches
where what’s in the skull
is quiet for a moment
where we connect
with all that is
all that ever was
or ever will be
with the all of all
(D James)
there are things I’ve done
that I would never tell
things I’ve said
I want to unsay
things I’ve seen
that do not disappear
by closing my eyes
thoughts
that cannot be unthought
rationalized
justified
explained away
apparently
you know what
I mean
because here
in the shadows
they say everyone
is hiding something
(D James)
watching the light change
from red to black
focused on the petty pace
of meaningless
routine
thoughts dissolve
as they move
like radio signals
to the vast reaches
of the universe
and suddenly my worries
seem as nothing
against the majestic backdrop
the city in twilight
from a rooftop
(D James)
had a dream
that it all worked out
all of it
money
happiness
life
had a reality
that it all worked out
all of it
then I woke
into a place
where none of it matters
and realized my search
was complete
and so am I
(D James)
my hand cut the sky
making the rain fall
my eyes saw the deepening darkness
which stopped my heart
pretending to be something
made of stronger stuff
waiting out the storm
I travelled a hundred hundred miles
in just under a thousand years
and ended up where I began
forsaken
forgiven
forever
in the quiet
(D James)
wishing for another time
wanting to be here with you
or at least be here at all
wishing for another place
where I could say
that which cannot
which will not
be expressed
wishing like wanting
like trying to wash away
years of shame and neglect
with a cup of cold dishwater
then finally
knowing wishing doesn’t make it so
I see there is work to be done
(D James)
I had a feeling
of wanting to move
to run
to shout at the ground
that would not move
it did not answer
looked up at the stars
and explained to them
what I was after
they did not respond
went to the roof
and shook my fist
at the night sky
screamed until my voice
fell to the sidewalk
the universe
did not care
I sat down
closed my eyes
and was silent
vowing to stay
until the senseless
makes sense
until the feeling to run
out of my own skin
subsides
I am silent
still
(D James)
feeling like it’s been amateur hour for far too long
feeling like this is all going to end
looking like the futile quest of some tattooed old man
chasing dreams on the back of a motorcycle named Rocinante
then again…
what’s wrong with that
(D James)