how do you do that?

this thing
that runs through my heart
like a freight train

knocks me down
and lifts me up
at the same time

brings me joy
and reminds me
to stay open
be vulnerable

this thing
unnameable
random
vast
deep

it knows no bounds
reaches deep inside
blows me away
scatters the pieces
to the darkest edges
of the universe

and somehow
makes me whole
again

how do you do that?

(D James)

until the dawn

it is the nights
that are most difficult

waiting
wanting

for the morning
that brings your voice

it is the nights
that are long

sleepless
restless​

hoping for a world
where 1+1=1

it is the nights
it is the nights
it is the nights

when darkness
grips my heart

renders me incapable

until the dawn
returns you to me

d. james

just once I’d like to find what I came here for…

forgetting that thing
I was going to check

wandering around the web
lost in its tangential branches

late night
grows later
as internet minutes
never correspond to clock time

eyes close
a finger rests
on a repeating key
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

(D James)

Up All Night Waiting For Something That Never Comes

it’s not that I can’t sleep
it’s that I don’t want to

an old habit
one that’s returned
with age

like a child
overtired
afraid I might
miss something

the city at rest
a cloud moving across the night sky
a song on the radio
or mother’s return

I stay up
waiting for the sun
waiting for something
to happen

until I’m too tired
to be tired

then I’ll go to sleep

(D. James)

the mouse runs on the wheel going forward and getting nowhere

must do
must always do

be doing
or be dead

action
moves the world
no time for anything
other than the doing

the being
is busy

busy
being busy
with all the doing

rushing
to the end
gold watch
and a monthly check
then a trip to eternity

never wondering
until it’s too late
where all this busy business
really gets us

(D James)