there is a hole
where my solar plexus
should be
a missing part
of me
left behind
like something
I forgot
to pack
a piece
of my soul
resembling lack
hold on to it
I promise I’ll
be back
(D. James)
Posts Tagged ‘self-referential’
hold on to it
In art, d. james, literature, poem, poetry, writing on 2 July 2010 at 1:10 pmthis is what it sounds like when you’re not here
In art, d. james, literature, poem, poetry, writing on 3 May 2010 at 12:03 pmall we have
are words
and I can’t find
any that fit
or don’t sound
self-serving
what’s left
is silence
maddening
deafening
unbearable
silence
(D. James)
JFK – 7 am
In art, d. james, literature, poem, poetry, writing on 30 April 2010 at 8:52 amunfinished sentences
all these things
left unsaid
a hundred words
stale phrases
none of them
enough
talk all damn day
and I’d still
never get
to what it is
that pulls at me
makes me want to stay
should have tried
should have missed that flight
should be there with you now
should stop trying to make sense
of any of this
because all I want
is to be
where I’m not
all I want
is to be
where
I am
not
(D. James)
somebody to love
In art, d. james, literature, poem, poetry, writing on 9 April 2010 at 12:26 pmwanting
someone
who gets the feeling
of all those words
in all those songs
like I do
someone fearless
who knows
the difference
between
pain and suffering
creating or courting
neither
but knowing
what it means
to feel deeply
to ache
to revel
in the glory
of being known
by another
like no other
to miss
the one you love
(D. James)
this is this
In art, d. james, literature, poem, poetry, writing on 7 April 2010 at 2:16 pmthis is bad
this desire
this wanting
this is not me
this is not you
this isn’t even who we think
this is
this is some evil
this
this twist
this pain
this feeling
this ache for you
this is just a dream
this nightmare
this remembrance of you
this haunting
this stillness of still wanting
this with you
this ending that never ends because I don’t want
this to ever end never wanted
this to end always wondered why
this did end
this always ending
this
(D. James)
confused? me too
In art, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 24 March 2010 at 2:17 pmup all night
looking
for something
that doesn’t exist
something
I don’t want
to see in me
avoiding
myself
by looking
everywhere
other than here
trying to get
out of my head
when I should
be in bed
another late
night
another wasted
morning
couldn’t I get
the same result
in another way
or another result
in the same way
it’s all the same
in the end
(D. James)
searching for dreams (don’t do no good in the real world)
In art, d. james, literature, poem, poetry, writing on 5 March 2010 at 2:06 pmin bed
curled around
her sleeping self
I think
this is what
I’ve always
wanted
to whisper
in an ear
that she’s
my one
and only one
but I don’t
realizing
that’s not me
that’s not her
it’s just an idea
in my head
from a song
Taupin wrote
about one of his
ex-wives
and what
does that
tell you
(D. James)
blap
In art, d. james, literature, poem, poetry, writing on 3 March 2010 at 8:59 pmthere are
all these words
and feelings
and messy things
spilled out
on the floor
like blood
seems there’s
no place
to put them all
can’t swallow them
try stuffing them
back into your gut
but they
no longer fit
feels like
you’ll die without
them
seems like
you’ll die with
them
where will you …
how will you …
what will you …
why would you …
go on?
(D. James)
calling
In art, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 24 February 2010 at 2:20 pmphone calls
text messages
and no one
gets back
what to do
feeling disconnected
feeling like no one’s
out there
feeling like no one
wants me
it’s only a thought
they’re all just busy
right now
in an hour
everyone
will call back
at once
and I’ll have
3 voice mails
and 5 text
messages
while trying
to get through
to my sister
in Tucson
to say
I love you
(D. James)
life may be empty and meaningless, but don’t tell that to my heart
In art, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 22 February 2010 at 3:02 pmdon’t know what
to do
with these feelings
when the woman
you love says
it doesn’t mean anything
like your love
doesn’t matter
like you
don’t
matter
it isn’t what she means
it’s just how it sounds
to you
in the moment
as she says goodbye
for the last time
what do you do
knowing she’s already
calling another man
lover
do you give in
to the rage
let it consume you
or can you find a way
to let it all go
as if it really
doesn’t matter
(D. James)
when is this going to be about you?
In art, bad sex and bad breath, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 20 February 2010 at 11:12 pmI’m so good
at making it all
about me
that even when
you think you’re
talking about you
it’s still about me
do you do that too
or is it just me?
(D. James)
quietly approaching
In art, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 29 January 2010 at 2:22 pmthere is something
and yet … and yet
a look
in the eye
something
or something
I made up
how
do you know
ten thousand
subtle seconds
and you only have
a moment to act
am I
the only one
who notices this
(D. James)
storm clouds passing
In art, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 25 January 2010 at 2:25 pmwhat do you
say
when it doesn’t
go your way
you fight
to make
a pointless
point
then you
feel bad
about
the things
you said
finally
you let it go
or
you let it
destroy you
the choice
is yours
(D. James)
This is what you don’t see because I don’t show it
In art, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 11 December 2009 at 4:24 pmI fret
am filled
with fear
as if
poured
into me
an endless pitcher
overflowing
into my mouth
filling me from
toes to teeth
I choke
cannot breathe
Am I doing
the right thing
should I have done
this or that
before or after
with her or him or it
should I not have
will there be enough
money
time
love
friendship
sex
What will become
of me
in time
before I turn
to dust
(D. James)
knock em out
In art, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 7 December 2009 at 4:05 pmTossing
attitude
throwing words
like punches
not caring
where they land
Uncertain
where this is
coming from
or where
it’s going
only that
I’m following
blindly
(D. James)
down day
In art, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 4 December 2009 at 3:56 pmThinking
of giving up
packing it in
leaving
Always looking
for support
someone to prop me up
or just lean me
against a wall
Feeling like
it’s never
gonna be enough
Swimming
in a pool
of self-pity
not wanting
to take
responsibility
wondering how
everyone else
seems to do it
so why
can’t I
(D. James)
stubborn lazy do-nothing fucker
In art, bad sex and bad breath, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 25 November 2009 at 9:20 pmlike a dog
that won’t come
a bird
that refuses
to sing
or a cat
that won’t hunt
what if
I just sat here
all damn day
listening to Nina
the sound
of all that pain
washing over me
like rain
(D. James)
let me just say this
In art, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 19 July 2009 at 5:38 pmwhatever I take
to bed
I wake up with
whatever is in
my head
I deal with
whatever it is
I’ve said
I have to
live with
and whatever happens
after I’m dead
I will have to
end with
(D. James)
little messes
In art, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 18 May 2009 at 4:50 pma mess here
a mess there
little piles
of my life
laid out
on the floor
and I wonder
sometimes
what is it
all for?
(D. James)
alley of deceit
In art, d. james, literature, poem, poetry, writing on 11 May 2009 at 4:30 pmI told lies
hiding
in your shadows
crept along
your fetid blacktop
lost my soul
and almost
my mind
but come
the morning
I found myself
on the other side
(D. James)
worn weary
In art, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 6 May 2009 at 3:48 pmsat up
half the night
with unhappy thoughts
come morning
they were still there
in a chair
by the bed
pulled them on
with my jeans
wore them
all damn day
till they
wore me out
sat up
half the night
with unhappy thoughts
determined that
in the morning
they’d be gone
moved the chair
into the kitchen
just in case
(D. James)
what if I said I knew it all?
In art, bad sex and bad breath, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 29 April 2009 at 9:17 amStayed online
all night long
Wrote down a few
words
But can’t tell me
a damn thing
Cause I
know it all
and nothing
nothing
nothing
at the same
time
(D. James)
can you have more answers than questions?
In art, d. james, literature, poem, poetry, writing on 17 April 2009 at 4:36 pmThere is the road
and then there is
the trip we take
on it
There is the sky
and the bird
that flies
There is the water
and the whale
There is fire
and smoke
Those who live
and them
that die
Questions
and even
some answers
(D. James)
conscious contact
In art, d. james, literature, poem, poetry, writing on 15 April 2009 at 5:03 pmcan’t write my way
out of this
tomorrow
brings more
of the same
like a rat
on a wheel
being aware
doesn’t seem
to make it
any easier
though I keep
hope alive
(D. James)
a way out
In art, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 13 April 2009 at 5:00 pmIn a struggle
of the mind
wanting to make
it out to be more
than it is
just a bunch
of thought
none of it
true
or all that
powerful
except when
I make it so
and so often
I do
more thought
doesn’t solve
anything
only action
gets me
out of my head
and into
the world
(D. James)
mind fuck
In art, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 9 April 2009 at 11:00 amhaving thoughts
about thoughts
that I thought up
last night
thoughts I’ve thought
a long time
new thoughts think
the old ones should
make room
but the old thoughts
think they know best
then there’s the thought
that all this thinking
isn’t getting us anywhere
I don’t even know
what to think
about that
(D. James)
omission missive
In art, bad sex and bad breath, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 7 April 2009 at 5:48 pmI don’t say
what’s on
my mind
When
it’s all
shit
So keep
my mouth
shut
Because
always
everyone
wants to help
And sometimes
I just need to be
where I’m at
Got it?
(D, James)
unbeknownst
In art, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 9 March 2009 at 4:22 pmhow many things
don’t I know?
of all the things
in the wide world
which I know
a fraction of a fraction
of a percent
how many things
do you know?
all thoughts
all languages
from the beginning
how we think
we know
anything at all
is beyond me
(D. James)
shy
In art, bad sex and bad breath, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 6 March 2009 at 12:22 amwhat comes between us
when we’re apart?
how can I let you in
from an arm’s length away?
averted glances
thwarted hopes
life’s just too risky
when I take every little thing
to mean something about me
(D. James)
what if you weren’t there
In art, bad poetry, bad sex and bad breath, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, snuff poems, writing on 13 February 2009 at 1:00 pmbilly blew
his brains out
and no one noticed
billy blew
his brains out
and no one cared
billy blew
his brains out
and you ask
who the hell
is billy anyway?
well, what if
billy
were you
(D. James)
where’d it go
In art, bad sex and bad breath, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 7 January 2009 at 5:00 pmBourbon and cigarettes
late-night hookers
down dark alleys
What doesn’t kill me
costs more than
just money
Turning fantasy into reality
shaking with adrenaline
getting kicks from anticipation
feeling more powerful
than any man should
Someday
I’ll get off
this merry-go-round
but I can’t seem to find
“someday” on the calendar
Maybe it falls on
February 30th
two-thousand-and-never
(D. James)
so I’ve been told
In art, bad sex and bad breath, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 26 December 2008 at 9:58 amIf I did
as I was told
twist and shout
rattle and hum
would it be annoying
or would you come
along
If I did
as I was told
there’d be
no poetry
at least not
from me
If I did
as I was told
I might remember
to care
that everyone
has an opinion
and some are quick
to share
If I did
as I was told
If only I ever
did as I was told
(D. James)
is it me or what?
In art, breakfast poems, d. james, literature, poem, poetry, writing on 12 December 2008 at 8:03 pmI wake
and the world
has not changed
since last I looked
The world wakes
looks at me and says
What are you still doing there
waiting for the world to change?
(D. James)
self-referential riddle #1
In art, d. james, literature, poem, poetry, writing on 22 May 2008 at 7:00 amIf I told you
I wrote this
for the sake
of writing it
Made it up
just now as
the words for
their meaning
and nothing
more
Would it hold
weight …
respond to gravity?
Or do we have
to assign some other
definition to make it
a poem,
something greater
than what it is?
(D. James)
