poems written on the fly

Posts Tagged ‘self-referential’

hold on to it

In art, d. james, literature, poem, poetry, writing on 2 July 2010 at 1:10 pm

there is a hole
where my solar plexus
should be

a missing part
of me

left behind
like something
I forgot
to pack

a piece
of my soul
resembling lack

hold on to it
I promise I’ll
be back

(D. James)

this is what it sounds like when you’re not here

In art, d. james, literature, poem, poetry, writing on 3 May 2010 at 12:03 pm

all we have
are words

and I can’t find
any that fit

or don’t sound
self-serving

what’s left
is silence

maddening
deafening
unbearable
silence

(D. James)

JFK – 7 am

In art, d. james, literature, poem, poetry, writing on 30 April 2010 at 8:52 am

unfinished sentences
all these things
left unsaid

a hundred words
stale phrases
none of them
enough

talk all damn day
and I’d still
never get
to what it is
that pulls at me
makes me want to stay

should have tried
should have missed that flight
should be there with you now
should stop trying to make sense
of any of this

because all I want
is to be
where I’m not

all I want
is to be
where
I am
not

(D. James)

somebody to love

In art, d. james, literature, poem, poetry, writing on 9 April 2010 at 12:26 pm

wanting
someone
who gets the feeling

of all those words
in all those songs
like I do

someone fearless

who knows
the difference
between
pain and suffering

creating or courting
neither

but knowing
what it means
to feel deeply

to ache

to revel
in the glory
of being known
by another
like no other

to miss
the one you love

(D. James)

this is this

In art, d. james, literature, poem, poetry, writing on 7 April 2010 at 2:16 pm

this is bad
this desire
this wanting

this is not me
this is not you
this isn’t even who we think
this is

this is some evil
this
this twist
this pain

this feeling
this ache for you

this is just a dream
this nightmare
this remembrance of you
this haunting

this stillness of still wanting
this with you

this ending that never ends because I don’t want
this to ever end never wanted
this to end always wondered why
this did end
this always ending
this

(D. James)

confused? me too

In art, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 24 March 2010 at 2:17 pm

up all night
looking
for something
that doesn’t exist

something
I don’t want
to see in me

avoiding
myself
by looking
everywhere
other than here

trying to get
out of my head
when I should
be in bed

another late
night

another wasted
morning

couldn’t I get
the same result
in another way

or another result
in the same way

it’s all the same
in the end

(D. James)

searching for dreams (don’t do no good in the real world)

In art, d. james, literature, poem, poetry, writing on 5 March 2010 at 2:06 pm

in bed
curled around
her sleeping self

I think
this is what
I’ve always
wanted

to whisper
in an ear

that she’s
my one
and only one

but I don’t
realizing
that’s not me
that’s not her

it’s just an idea
in my head
from a song
Taupin wrote
about one of his
ex-wives

and what
does that
tell you

(D. James)

blap

In art, d. james, literature, poem, poetry, writing on 3 March 2010 at 8:59 pm

there are
all these words
and feelings
and messy things

spilled out
on the floor
like blood

seems there’s
no place
to put them all

can’t swallow them

try stuffing them
back into your gut

but they
no longer fit

feels like
you’ll die without
them

seems like
you’ll die with
them

where will you …
how will you …
what will you …
why would you …

go on?

(D. James)

calling

In art, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 24 February 2010 at 2:20 pm

phone calls
text messages

and no one
gets back

what to do

feeling disconnected
feeling like no one’s
out there
feeling like no one
wants me

it’s only a thought
they’re all just busy
right now

in an hour
everyone
will call back
at once

and I’ll have
3 voice mails
and 5 text
messages

while trying
to get through
to my sister
in Tucson
to say
I love you

(D. James)

life may be empty and meaningless, but don’t tell that to my heart

In art, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 22 February 2010 at 3:02 pm

don’t know what
to do
with these feelings

when the woman
you love says
it doesn’t mean anything

like your love
doesn’t matter
like you
don’t
matter

it isn’t what she means
it’s just how it sounds
to you
in the moment
as she says goodbye
for the last time

what do you do
knowing she’s already
calling another man
lover

do you give in
to the rage
let it consume you
or can you find a way
to let it all go

as if it really
doesn’t matter

(D. James)

when is this going to be about you?

In art, bad sex and bad breath, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 20 February 2010 at 11:12 pm

I’m so good
at making it all
about me

that even when
you think you’re
talking about you

it’s still about me

do you do that too
or is it just me?

(D. James)

quietly approaching

In art, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 29 January 2010 at 2:22 pm

there is something
and yet … and yet

a look
in the eye

something
or something
I made up

how
do you know

ten thousand
subtle seconds

and you only have
a moment to act

am I
the only one
who notices this

(D. James)

storm clouds passing

In art, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 25 January 2010 at 2:25 pm

what do you
say

when it doesn’t
go your way

you fight
to make
a pointless
point

then you
feel bad
about
the things
you said

finally
you let it go
or
you let it
destroy you

the choice
is yours

(D. James)

This is what you don’t see because I don’t show it

In art, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 11 December 2009 at 4:24 pm

I fret
am filled
with fear

as if
poured
into me

an endless pitcher
overflowing
into my mouth

filling me from
toes to teeth

I choke
cannot breathe

Am I doing
the right thing

should I have done
this or that
before or after
with her or him or it

should I not have

will there be enough
money
time
love
friendship
sex

What will become
of me
in time

before I turn
to dust

(D. James)

knock em out

In art, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 7 December 2009 at 4:05 pm

Tossing
attitude

throwing words
like punches

not caring
where they land

Uncertain
where this is
coming from

or where
it’s going

only that
I’m following
blindly

(D. James)

down day

In art, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 4 December 2009 at 3:56 pm

Thinking
of giving up

packing it in
leaving

Always looking
for support
someone to prop me up

or just lean me
against a wall

Feeling like
it’s never
gonna be enough

Swimming
in a pool
of self-pity

not wanting
to take
responsibility

wondering how
everyone else
seems to do it

so why
can’t I

(D. James)

stubborn lazy do-nothing fucker

In art, bad sex and bad breath, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 25 November 2009 at 9:20 pm

like a dog
that won’t come

a bird
that refuses
to sing

or a cat
that won’t hunt

what if
I just sat here
all damn day

listening to Nina

the sound
of all that pain
washing over me
like rain

(D. James)

let me just say this

In art, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 19 July 2009 at 5:38 pm

whatever I take
to bed

I wake up with

whatever is in
my head

I deal with

whatever it is
I’ve said

I have to
live with

and whatever happens
after I’m dead

I will have to
end with

(D. James)

little messes

In art, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 18 May 2009 at 4:50 pm

a mess here
a mess there

little piles
of my life

laid out
on the floor

and I wonder
sometimes
what is it
all for?

(D. James)

alley of deceit

In art, d. james, literature, poem, poetry, writing on 11 May 2009 at 4:30 pm

I told lies
hiding
in your shadows

crept along
your fetid blacktop

lost my soul
and almost
my mind

but come
the morning

I found myself
on the other side

(D. James)

worn weary

In art, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 6 May 2009 at 3:48 pm

sat up
half the night
with unhappy thoughts

come morning
they were still there
in a chair
by the bed

pulled them on
with my jeans
wore them
all damn day

till they
wore me out

sat up
half the night
with unhappy thoughts

determined that
in the morning
they’d be gone

moved the chair
into the kitchen
just in case

(D. James)

what if I said I knew it all?

In art, bad sex and bad breath, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 29 April 2009 at 9:17 am

Stayed online
all night long

Wrote down a few
words

But can’t tell me
a damn thing

Cause I
know it all
and nothing
nothing
nothing

at the same
time

(D. James)

can you have more answers than questions?

In art, d. james, literature, poem, poetry, writing on 17 April 2009 at 4:36 pm

There is the road
and then there is
the trip we take
on it

There is the sky
and the bird
that flies

There is the water
and the whale

There is fire
and smoke

Those who live
and them
that die

Questions
and even
some answers

(D. James)

conscious contact

In art, d. james, literature, poem, poetry, writing on 15 April 2009 at 5:03 pm

can’t write my way
out of this

tomorrow
brings more
of the same

like a rat
on a wheel

being aware
doesn’t seem
to make it
any easier

though I keep
hope alive

(D. James)

a way out

In art, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 13 April 2009 at 5:00 pm

In a struggle
of the mind

wanting to make
it out to be more
than it is

just a bunch
of thought
none of it
true

or all that
powerful

except when
I make it so
and so often
I do

more thought
doesn’t solve
anything

only action
gets me
out of my head
and into
the world

(D. James)

mind fuck

In art, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 9 April 2009 at 11:00 am

having thoughts
about thoughts
that I thought up
last night

thoughts I’ve thought
a long time

new thoughts think
the old ones should
make room

but the old thoughts
think they know best

then there’s the thought
that all this thinking
isn’t getting us anywhere

I don’t even know
what to think
about that

(D. James)

omission missive

In art, bad sex and bad breath, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 7 April 2009 at 5:48 pm

I don’t say
what’s on
my mind

When
it’s all
shit

So keep
my mouth
shut

Because
always
everyone
wants to help

And sometimes
I just need to be
where I’m at

Got it?

(D, James)

unbeknownst

In art, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 9 March 2009 at 4:22 pm

how many things
don’t I know?

of all the things
in the wide world
which I know

a fraction of a fraction
of a percent

how many things
do you know?

all thoughts
all languages
from the beginning

how we think
we know
anything at all
is beyond me

(D. James)

shy

In art, bad sex and bad breath, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 6 March 2009 at 12:22 am

what comes between us
when we’re apart?

how can I let you in
from an arm’s length away?

averted glances
thwarted hopes

life’s just too risky
when I take every little thing
to mean something about me

(D. James)

what if you weren’t there

In art, bad poetry, bad sex and bad breath, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, snuff poems, writing on 13 February 2009 at 1:00 pm

billy blew
his brains out
and no one noticed

billy blew
his brains out
and no one cared

billy blew
his brains out
and you ask

who the hell
is billy anyway?

well, what if
billy
were you

(D. James)

where’d it go

In art, bad sex and bad breath, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 7 January 2009 at 5:00 pm

Bourbon and cigarettes
late-night hookers
down dark alleys

What doesn’t kill me
costs more than
just money

Turning fantasy into reality
shaking with adrenaline
getting kicks from anticipation
feeling more powerful
than any man should

Someday
I’ll get off
this merry-go-round
but I can’t seem to find
“someday” on the calendar

Maybe it falls on
February 30th
two-thousand-and-never

(D. James)

so I’ve been told

In art, bad sex and bad breath, d. james, literature, overweight champions, poem, poetry, writing on 26 December 2008 at 9:58 am

If I did
as I was told

twist and shout
rattle and hum

would it be annoying
or would you come
along

If I did
as I was told

there’d be
no poetry
at least not
from me

If I did
as I was told

I might remember
to care

that everyone
has an opinion
and some are quick
to share

If I did
as I was told

If only I ever
did as I was told

(D. James)

is it me or what?

In art, breakfast poems, d. james, literature, poem, poetry, writing on 12 December 2008 at 8:03 pm

I wake
and the world
has not changed
since last I looked

The world wakes
looks at me and says
What are you still doing there
waiting for the world to change?

(D. James)

self-referential riddle #1

In art, d. james, literature, poem, poetry, writing on 22 May 2008 at 7:00 am

If I told you
I wrote this
for the sake
of writing it

Made it up
just now as
the words for
their meaning
and nothing
more

Would it hold
weight …
respond to gravity?

Or do we have
to assign some other
definition to make it
a poem,
something greater
than what it is?

(D. James)